It has been a few years since I completed my A levels, gaining 3A*’s. Every year results day comes around, and there are always the petulant and belligerent headlines and statements complaining that some students are upset at getting an A instead of an A*. I fully understand that both are very good grades, and that there are a lot of people who would be … Continue reading Getting an A instead of an A* debate
Paroxysm means a sudden attack or outburst of a particular emotion or activity. I’d like to believe that my ‘substance abuse’ is a paroxysm. Unfortunately, it isn’t. It isn’t sudden or spontaneous; it’s predictable. It’s when I feel low, when I’m bored and/or when I feel like I need some kind of connection, some kind of feeling. Maybe I do this because every time I … Continue reading Journal entry, of a ‘crazy’ person.
(Un) Happy Ending: To everybody, I am nobody To myself, I am black tar I am a lost spectre in this word I am what people want me to be, I am what they see: an angel, a daughter, an academic. I am a master at hiding pain, at hiding myself But behind my grand facade, lies: an addict, a mess, a self-doubting, self-destructive human … Continue reading (Un) Happy Ending, a poem
To me, this is one of the most honest and beautiful songs ever written. But that is what makes it deceptive. To the ‘ordinary’ person, heroin could never be seen as honest or beautiful. Both the lyrics and the melody take the listener on a journey; one that some people might consider to be similar to heroin: it starts out honest, peaceful and inspiring, but … Continue reading The Velvet Underground, Heroin.
Arguably, this was Ed Sheeran’s breakthrough song. It certainly was in the UK. I love this song for numerous reasons. Primarily, it’s because his innocently brilliant voice conveys an incredibly macabre message. This juxtaposition is beautiful, because it demonstrates that innocent people can not only write about, but also comprehend, the darkest moments in life. That is simultaneously beautiful and devastating. Perhaps that is somewhat … Continue reading Ed Sheeran, The A Team.
In most of my posts, I have been drunk when writing, and this one is no different. To me, well I feel more creative. Maybe I’m delusional. I mean how ridiculous does it sound when someone says that they write best when they’re drunk. In the future, maybe I’ll look back at myself and think I was a complete idiot. But, to me, at this … Continue reading The weirdest thing.
Some people have no concept or idea of what life is. Maybe I’m one of those people. But, I hope not. Maybe the people who don’t really question the meaning of life, are the true winners, because they can never feel sorrow when they realize the answers are impossible, or not really what they seem. Indeed, if you aren’t capable of overthinking, then you can’t … Continue reading What is life?
In reading the work of De Quincy and Baudelaire, among others, I knew that my life had changed, because they were the main reason I ever tried alcohol and drugs in the first place. To me, I wanted to be a part of that culture and scene; I wanted to know what their literature was really about, and be able to understand it to the … Continue reading Are alcohol and drugs ever the answer?
I love both of these artists, and although I’m not a huge fan of all of GG Allin’s songs, I still think he was an absolutely fantastic artist. I’m going to compare GG Allin’s ‘Carmelita’, to Lou Reed’s ‘Perfect Day’. GG Allin, Carmelita: The tune and rhythm of this song make me feel as if I should be happy; like how we feel when we … Continue reading Music review: GG Allin Vs Lou Reed.
Alcohol is a beautiful substance for two key reasons: it makes us feel f****** great if we drink enough, and it’s legal. This is why I am in love with it, and the effects it has on me. It seems to make my life so much more beautiful and amazing, because it manages to take my mind off trivial and, quite frankly, unimportant matters, that … Continue reading Alcohol’s allure – how different is it to drugs? Personal, social and economic perspective.
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